ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

Sooo....remember that time we went to Atlanta for an interview?  Way back in the summer?  Well, Mr. F didn't get that job.  But the company liked him enough that they asked him to try for another position.  This led to a Skype interview and Mr. F flying up to Atlanta for another interview the day before I flew to Utah for The Stud's wedding.  It was chaos.  Good chaos.  We didn't hear anything from the company the entire time I was gone.  And that was a long time people!  Mr. F interviewed with other companies and those options fell through before hearing back from the Atlanta job.  The Friday after my return, Mr. F got an email offering him a position.  A good position.  Like, the kind of job we've been praying for and hoping for.  That was a week and a half ago.  Since then, we've been making hurried plans to venture north into the heart of the South.  This has included purchasing a car (which should be finalized today!), finding a place to stay, and getting contracts signed.  Until the latter happened, both of us were hesitant to share any news.  We didn't want to jinx anything.  But now?  Now I'm telling you all!  

MR. F GOT A JOB!!!!!  AND WE'RE MOVING TO ATLANTA!!!

One of these days I'm going to put up a side-by-side comparison of this move to our move to Cyprus.  It's laughable how not stressed we both are over all of this.  That said, I do need to get a few things  packed and sorted still since we're leaving, oh, on Saturday.  No big!  Just a whole lot of happy going on!  

I wanted to thank everyone for your prayers, notes, and love through these last eight months.  I know employment is not a magic cure-all, but the piece of mind that comes from this change is overwhelming to us both.  We absolutely could not have made it without you faithful friends and family who still read this little blog even though we're not globe-trotting anymore.  You have aided us in more ways than I can ever express and I am deeply, deeply grateful for you!


p.s. we found out that Jeni's Ice Cream is opening a shop in Atlanta right NOW!  personally, I think it's a sign that we're supposed to move.  Jeni's AND Braves baseball?!  bring it on!!

step 2

Well, we've officially moved into the "anger" portion of the grieving process.  After a few days of numbness, now we're just mad.  At unemployment, moving companies, limited resources, lack of time, exhaustion, not knowing what's coming next, a serious hitch to our plans.  We're just frustrated now.

Last night I went for a drive by myself.  Just long enough for me to scream into the heavens my fears through gasping sobs.  "I CAN'T DO THIS!" I yelled repeatedly, "I CAN'T! I don't know what I'm doing."  I don't.  I wake up in the morning, content for the two seconds before I realize my life has just been flipped upside down.   Then the rest of the day is spent in a haze of (usually) quiet grief and confusion.  "I'm trying to be faithful and understand Your plan for us right now but I don't know what I'm doing..."  I screamed and cried until my vision was so blurry from a blinding headache that I had to go home.  No more tears that night.  

I'm so overwhelmed right now.  I get emails all day long, from people wanting to buy Peggy Sue, family wanting to know plans, friends wanting to help.  I'm sending out emails to moving companies, trying to figure out how to get our stuff home "affordably" and quickly.

All I want to do is lay on the sofa.

Tomorrow is Monday.  Hopefully we will have more answers as we hear back from more moving companies.  Hopefully we can set a date for departure.  Hopefully...tomorrow...

But today?  I'm still just mad.

what i wore today

As Mr. F left for work this morning, he whispered into my groggy ears, "You could have story times for toddlers once a week in Cyprus."  Somehow I was conscious enough to recognize this suggestion, the latest in a long list of ways Mr. F has been finding ways for me to utilize my talents.  We have been discussing this a lot as our budget in Cyprus is going to be rather tight and we don't yet know if I will be able to work.  The common thought has been hosting weekly art classes for little ones.  Teaching them about colors, shapes, and a bit about some major artists through history.

Well, since I decided that today was definitely the day I avoided packing for our triumphant two week return to Amrika, I hit the interweb to see what I could find by way of lesson plans and project ideas.  There were some really great sources out there, but I'm still hunting for the right "thing."  Anyway, during my search, I stumbled upon this and, well, fell in love.  Immediately my muse spoke to me and I grabbed my sketchbook.  I wanted to draw what I was wearing today.

My family will probably see this and laugh because they know that this is, in fact, what I wear every day, not just today.  But still!  A fun project for the afternoon!  Plus it somehow motivated me to start making piles for suitcases and get some final loads of laundry going.

Do you have any suggestions for teaching art to children?  I'm thinking this could be a really fun adventure!

p.s. Can someone teach me how to take better photos of my artwork pleeeeease?  There's got to be a better way to do this, even with a point and shoot.  

slow learner

I'm a worry wort.  Okay, that's an understatement.  I'm the girl who sees change coming, bursts into tears and then climbs into bed for a couple of days thinking it will all go away.  My panic over Cyprus is beyond expression.  There are so very many things that are out of my control with this move. I  don't know when we'll be there, if visas will actually come through.  Moving our belongings is still a mystery.  Do we need to ship furniture or will we find a furnished place?  When can all of our family get together before we leave?  When are we leaving?! 

Yesterday was a good day.  Drink cocoa, go on walks, casually look online at housing and imagine what life on Cyprus would be like.

Today is the day I climbed back in bed and hid.  And cried. And ate my favorite cookies. I can't do this!  There isn't enough time!  There isn't enough information!  We're not even back in Florida yet!

 Serving as their wake-up call, I gave my parents a ring this afternoon.  My very groggy mum put my less groggy but barely lucid Nonny on the phone.  He and I had not spoken much since the decision was made to accept the offer.  Nonny asked some questions, a few of which I could answer, many I could not.  Even though he was barely awake, I could sense his excitement over this change and his repeated statement of "I'm so proud of you two" made me blush.

I shared my apprehensions, the lack of information I'm dealing with and the uneasy feeling it leaves in my stomach.  He yawned, and then said, "Act on faith, Boo Boo, not on fear."  I'm not acting on fear, dude, I'm just scared, okay? "Fear is the absence of faith.  Faith is the absence of fear." Derp.

Not long after, Mr. F called to say he had just gotten off the phone with people in Cyprus.  I was expecting this conversation to have answered all my questions.  It didn't and I fell apart.  Poor Mr. F... I started crying and asked him to call me later this afternoon.  I sent him emails over the next hour regaling him with questions I thought he should be able to answer.  He didn't answer any of them.  Instead he sent me this, a General Conference address by Quentin L. Cook when he was called to be an apostle.  As I began reading the thought came to me "I didn't ask you to be a member of the Twelve, just to move to Cyprus."  Derp.

In the opening paragraph, Elder Cook shares a memory from when he was called as a general authority and feeling inadequate.  Neal A. Maxwell told him then "that the most important qualification for all of us serving in the kingdom is to be comfortable in bearing witness of the divinity of the Savior."  I can do that, right?  That's not contingent on boxes being shipped or visas.  I can always do that...  A little later he quotes 2 Timothy 1:7, "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."  Act on faith, Boo Boo, not on fear.

My husband and father shared the same message with me in very different ways.   

Mr. F did answer one question for me.  I asked him how he was feeling about things after his conversation with Cyprus today.  "I feel calm and I am confident that things will work out how they need to."  Oh heavens, I love that man!

When are we getting to Cyprus? Dunno! 

What are we shipping over?  We'll figure that out when we need to.

Will our visas go through?   It's an international company, Engquist, they know what they are doing.

Do we have enough information?  We know what we're supposed to at this point.

Can I still testify of Christ? You betcha!

Can I move forward with faith?  Yes. 

what if?

Apparently, I am now a grown-up.  This epiphany just dawned as I have been sitting here for hours, overwhelmed beyond belief because of one itty bitty little thing.


Mr. F got a job offer!


This has been in the works for about a week but we got the official offer today.  It's a killer offer for us and especially for Mr. F.  If you could have asked him what he wanted to do with his political science degree, he would have said this, and this is exactly what we have been offered.

Why is this freaking me out?  Simple.

The job is in Cyprus.

Maybe you're smarter than me, but I had absolutely no idea where this was until two weeks ago.  Turns out it's right in the middle of "Huh???", "Oh!", and "Woah....".  More specifically, an island in the Mediterranean Sea about seventy miles south of Turkey.  (Hence the "Woah...")

Now, Mr. F and I have never had real jobs before.  Yeah, we've both worked, but this gig comes with benefits!  I had almost given up the dream of having health insurance again and the idea of paid time off has got to be revolutionary.  People get paid time off?? Really?? "Woah...."  This alone is a lot for me to handle.  I feel like I've come home from school with permission slips and health forms and need my parents to read over them.  "Is this a good deal?" I want to ask.  The thing is, none of us really knows!  Why?

Because the job is in freaking Cyprus! 

So now we're not only trying to figure out if This is a good offer or  not, but if Cyprus will let us come and live there.  Weird...

Just for the record, when we used to play the "What if?" game, Cyprus was never mentioned.  I think we covered parts of the Middle East, lots of Asia and Europe, but never Cyprus.  You better believe Cyprus is now dominating the "What if?" game.


What if we moved to Cyprus:

Is the Church there?  {yes!!!!!!}
What kind of outlets do they use? {zone G, or like in the UK}
Do they speak English? {yes}
Would we need a car? {TBD}
Do they have bundt pans? {....}
What kind of foods are available?
Are there art supply stores? {yes!}
What about libraries? {yes!}
How big of an apartment could we afford?
How much stuff do we take?
Are there English bookstores?{yes!}
Is the temple nearby?  {no..but travel is pretty easy from the island}
Could Engquist handle the heat?  {umm......maybe?}

So everyone pull out your globes and find the Mediterranean, because so long as we get visas, that's where you'll be able to find us sometime in the foreseeable future!  In the meantime, we've got boxes to go through, yard sales to host, housing to find, and all sorts of crazy outlet adapters to procure.

tack så mycket!

We go back to the States in less than two weeks.  Can you say crazy?!  When did that happen?  My goal, as piddly as it may be, has always been to get our wedding thank you notes written and addressed so we could just plop them in the mail when we returned to normally priced postage. I am pleased to report that I have been writing them fairly steadily, but the addressing leaves a lot to be desired.  As in...I haven't started it.

I just reached the end of my note list (Mr. F is nowhere near done with his.  I won this competition, but no, I'm not keeping track) leaving me with nothing but the addresses.  And then I realized how tedious this process is going to be.  In the nearly six months we have been married, a great many things have happened besides our own numberless moves everywhere.  For the sake of my own sanity, I needed to share the great many changes that have transpired from my end of the thank you list alone to make addressing more complicated.

At least three people on my list have passed away since our wedding in March.  At least.  There may be more.  Two of these three are my grandmothers.  One of these two made my wedding dress and provided the bulk of the decorations for our reception.  She died the day after her birthday.  She never got her thank you note.

My other grandmother's gift arrived in two parts.  Her health began deteriorating rapidly just days before our wedding preventing her attendance.  When I made it back to Florida after Nana's funeral, a giant box was waiting for me in the foyer.  It was a quilt from Grandpa J and L's home in Oregon.  She remembered my fondness of the coral pink quilt and wanted me to have it as I began to set up house.  As if it needed to be mentioned, I sat on the floor wrapped in the quilt surrounded by everything I still had to pack for Germany and cried violently.  Two grandmothers in three weeks.  Really?  Is that necessary?

The second part of her gift arrived while we have been abroad and I'm looking forward to seeing it in person.  An oval serving bowl in our china pattern.  Luckily, I can still write to Grandpa and thank him.  That's been done.

Personally, I don't want to know if anyone else has died.  I don't think I could handle that for a little while.  The other changes to the mailing list are far more joyous, luckily.  Many of my friends have moved since our nuptials took place. Several to Texas and others to places I'll find out as I send them emails.  A few have gotten married, some have had babies, and at least one is now expecting.  A couple have just moved across town.

I've really enjoyed writing these notes actually.  I have such fond memories of our wedding and the people to whom these letters are being written.  It's mind boggling to me that we have been married for nearly six months already, let alone that we have been in Europe for roughly three.  It seems like so little time has passed by, but so much has happened.

In honor of the occasion, here are a few images of our life the past few months.

  

 

love is blind

Parents are unfailingly bias. I recently requested aid in my search for more permanent employment. The Tall Guy responded by sending me an email with a link to a posting on monster.com. I went to the posting to see that Alicia Keys is looking for a professional blogger to maintain her new website. My father and I talked about it and he said that I was the perfect fit for the personality the internationally-acclaimed singer/songwriter is in search of.

"She wants someone who motivates others and inspires them. That's you, Boo!"

I blushed and smiled under the confidence my father has in my talents. Then I read through the qualifications and job demands more thoroughly. My dad saw nothing but my talents while I saw nothing but how I was, yet again, under-qualified for a job.

So I got to thinking, Why don't I apply for the job? It's a shot in the dark for any of the tens of thousands of people I'm sure are bound to send in their resume. But why not? I always see my faults, why shouldn't I see my potential and just jump off a cliff for once? Tall Guy, thanks for only seeing me through your rose-colored glasses and thereby reminding me that I really am all that and a bag of chips. One day, I'll find my niche. Today, I'll apply for the job of a lifetime.

library delights

"Excuse me, do you have any books about animals?" The question came from a pair of sisters, neither of whom was taller than my waist.

"What kind of animals?"

"Any animals."

"Do you want picture books or are you wanting to learn about animals?"

"We want to learn about animals." le sigh.

"Follow me! I've got just the thing."

The sisters then followed me through the library until we sat on the floor together flipping through a book about dangerous animals. They were engrossed. I was positive a safari was never ever making it onto my to-do list.

"Guess what?" This came from the youngest, who had the most adorable buck teeth. Who knew buck teeth could be so cute?

"What?!" I really was excited to know what she had to tell me, and secretly hoping she wanted me to adopt her.

"There's a baby elephant at the zoo and it's birthday is tomorrow and it turns one."

And then they both told me about their experiences at the zoo, their cousin's pet snake, vicious cats, and I just sat there listening to the girls. I really did want to adopt them. Or at least play with them for the next couple of days. Dangerous animal books can be dangerously fun in the right hands.

marian

Due to aforementioned reasons, the past couple of days have been rather hard on me. Thanks to an abundance of phone calls, a lovely (and ever so helpful) visit from my dad, The Tall Guy, I was able to go to work today. Because of this, I have a funny story to share.

Backstory. I have always been a geek, and I've loved every minute of it. I was shy and quiet and not very sure of myself. It has only been in the past year or so that I've a) really started liking myself, and b) started thinking well of myself. This includes regarding myself as attractive. (I'm not begging for compliments here, people, I'm just tellin' it how it is.)

That said, when I got to work there were these two teenage girls here. Honestly, if I were sixteen, we'd probably be friends. A little quirky, bookish, but fun. They kept asking me for help with the locations of various odd books and I felt solidified in the idea that me and these girls were cosmically connected.

Included in their posse was this boy. Shaggy blond hair, fitted tan corduroy jacket, eccentric shoes. If I were in high school, this would be my Pedestal Crush. You know, the guy that you think is too cool for you but you worship from afar? That was most definitely him. I got a fiendish delight in such thoughts.

Then he came up to me to introduce himself. He gave me his name, mentioned that he was the girls' math tutor, wanted to know if I was single, etc, etc. I wanted to burst out laughing. This was my iconic Pedestal Crush and here he was, shuffling from foot to foot trying to muster up the guts to talk to me. I was supposed to be the awkward one, not the cute one that makes the situation apparently unbearable for the approaching party. I let him down gently, knowing what it felt like to be in his shoes, never thinking I'd ever be approached in such a way.

And then? Then I smiled like the high schooler I felt like inside. The cool guy thinks I'm cute! I'm pretty? I'm pretty! I'm the pretty librarian! This officially takes care of about six dreams I've always had for myself, all in one night. I freaking love working at the library!

definitely not a PC, maybe I could be a mac

I like people. That said...

This woman comes up to me in the library this afternoon as I was shelving books.

"Where is the Black History section?" she asks me.

"You know, I just started a few days ago, and I'm not entirely sure. If you go up to the Information Desk, I'm sure someone will be able to direct you."

"Do you not have a section for Black History? Does the library not recognize it?"

This is where I got peeved. I wanted to drop my poised library-employee persona and just say, No, the library doesn't recognize Black History just like it doesn't recognize Swedish-American History. I've been pissed about it for years, excuse me as I go file a lawsuit. AND I'm a racist. Happy?! Good.

Instead, I replied, "The library does designate African American books with stickers on the binding. I'm just not sure where the specific history section is located. I'm sorry I couldn't be of more help."

attn: john

Dear Borders,

You and I have had quite the ride together, as you well know. I have savored each and every moment, but I think the time has come for me to sever the ties a bit. You're an Ann Arbor based company, and I need to maintain every connection to Michigan that I can now so all is not lost. But things are going to be different now.

It's not you, it's just, I found the ultimate book lover's store. Half-Price Books. It's here in Columbus and is the first place, besides your one charming location and Caribou Coffee, that really made me feel like I belonged and had a home.

Today I went to two different locations and found an absolute stockpile of books that I doubt I ever would have looked at before. I sat on the floor and ruffled through pages of books on art history, fashion, architecture, gardening, U.S. and world history. The shelves were bursting with books I had never even heard of! And then there was the fact that the store was hiring, right when I so desperately need a job.

I'm sorry Borders, I wish things could be different, but they just aren't. Maybe we'll be able to go back to how things were when I leave Columbus.

-engquist